Just because I love babies doesn't mean I want one more

I'm surrounded by babies. This past year most of my friends have had babies, or are having babies. I became a godmother earlier in the week and am so honored to take on that role to a precious baby girl. My "babies" are now seven (soon to be eight) and three years old now. When my son was three I was pregnant with my daughter.  I guess people think "it's that time again", they keep asking me when I'm going to have another child. I don't have plans for another child right now. Maybe never. Yeah, most likely, never. I'm quite content with my two beautiful children that I'm blessed to have.

A week or so ago I babysat a friend's 5 month old - and even my husband told me, "don't get any ideas". Truthfully his comment angered me. I didn't have "any ideas", so I asked him if he did. What we discussed and our reasoning is personal and between us - but our decision leans to no more children. Still, it seems that everyone around us wants us to have more children. Just saying that "I am done" doesn't seem to satisfy them. We feel that ultimately our family is complete and our reasons are our own.

I don't like feeling the pressure from family and friends that I am expected to be some kind of baby factory. I love babies, but that doesn't mean I want to have more children. My reasons are mine and no amount of telling me what I want nor holding newborns can change my decision.   

The constant pressure to have more children bothers me. Some might say that for the sheer fact that I am "venting about it" means that I do want more children. Sure, I've thought about it but its MY business. My decision. What bothers me is the sheer fact that other people are trying to tell me what I want or should want. It makes me feel backed into a corner like I am unable to make my own decisions or choices. It makes me feel like I am somehow letting everyone around me down because my decision isn't in line with theirs.  But, ultimately I know that decision belongs to me (and my husband) and is ours alone to make.

Original New Jersey Moms Blog post by MaryTara.  MT's blogs her adventures in parenting two beautiful children on the Jersey Shore, life with autism & without it, the gluten & casein free diet, and vaccination choice issues at The Bon Bon Gazette.